He'd rather have his hand than me.

I don't think I have ever been so angry at myself! So since I miscarried, I've been trying to get pregnant again, for the first month or so I felt ewww so I didn't really feel like having sex, but since late November I have been trying to get him to have sex with me every so often. This past week I've been trying everyday, and I always got the excuse "I'm just really tired.. blah blah blah" Well I finally got him to give it a go, and after almost a half hour at it, he still hadn't gone... So I finally asked him, when the last time he got himself off, an low and behold he said yesterday... one of the many days I had been trying to have sex with him. But I suppose He would rather jack off to some half naked animated chick with boobs 4 times the size of her waist. and I mean why not right? If I wasn't so disgusting maybe I'd have a shot with him, but since I'm so fucking huge and the only time he'll even do it with me he has to close his eyes, well I guess I deserve to be the second choice. I mean seriously wouldn't everyone else rather have pretend sex with some fictional hottie than some real life pile of shit? My husband sure does.